Trick or Treating with Lindsay Lohan

It was Halloween yesterday which means TRICK OR TREATING. I dressed up Ally as a witch for and she, her father, her baby brother and I set off for an evening of begging for candy.

This was Ally's second try at Trick or Treating. She was only 18 months last year and I entrusted her to the 2 year old daughter of another friend as they led each other down dark pathways to sugary delights. This year Ally and Taylor were old hats at the tradition.

I let Ally have a piece of candy at our first house, which was probably a mistake because once she got a taste of the delicious chocolaty taste, she was hooked. Addicted. Every time she got a piece of candy she would beg with me "Please Mommy I want the Candy" (Is now the time for me to say that I was doing my best Brittney imitation by starting off the evening by having 3 glasses of champagne w. a friend at a pumpkin carving party).



Well, we were able to get the sweet sugar from her, but this took a stint of putting ALly in Detox. One day at time baby, one day at time.

The day began this morning as she screamed from her bed "I WANT CANDY" I thought to myself, oh no, we may need to send her to that awesome rehab center in Utah. I could use a vacation. Luckily we were able to wean her off the sauce. Until next year...

Note: The photo is from last Halloween until I get my lazy self to put an updated one up!

Raising Her Right.....

As we cruise down the highway I hear a little voice behind me demanding song requests. Our latest obsession has been The Beatles. Sure The Beatles are all right. But well, it's just not enough attitude for me.

But my little music student made her momma proud when she said " I wanna hear The Boss! The Boss is Cool!" and as I placed Bruce Springsteen in the player, my heart filled with pride as my 2 year old diva screamed " I love The Boss! He is so cool!"

Oh my lovely student, we are going to get along just fine....

Personality Conflict

Dear Ally:

As I write this you're 2 and a half. As you read this your 13 and we've had a major argument. You're probably mad at me because I won't let you wear whatever their wearing now or go wherever you're going.

Today as I write this your 2 and half self is having a tantrum in your room crib. You've been having tantrums all morning. I wouldn't let you play with the baby wipes. I wouldn't let you hit your new baby brother. I kissed you. I touched you. Whatever it has been it's been a rough day. And our personalities our clashing. I want you to go my way and you want me to go yours. Neither one of us wants to give in. We both want to win.

I'm sure your 13 year old self is going through a lot of changes. Your 2 year old self has been through a lot too. You had a new baby brother 6 weeks ago. We decided to take you out of daycare and you're home with me. This week we're in Pittsburgh visiting your Mimi and Pop Pop. It's been a Topsy turvy world and no doubt you're confused and well that would make anyone a little cranky. I know it does me whenever my world changes.

Today has been a rough day. Like as you read this, your tears do bring me pain. Your 2 year old self's tears also bring me pain. As we have our personality conflicts and our power struggles, as you fight me, I want nothing more than to take you in my arms and hold you. I want to rock you and hold you tight and not let you go. I want your pain to be my pain. Because for you, I would take that. Your smiles and laughter are more valuable to than any thing.

But we struggle to find that balance. To find that place where we both are happy.

You're 2 year old self is napping now. I wait for you to wake up and give you a giant hug. To see your smiles and to play with you. To let you know that it's all going to be okay. And for us to find that balance again. For us to find the rhythm of the wheel that makes up both feel safe and content.

As you read this, I'm waiting for your 13 year old self to come out of your room. And like your 2 year old self I know that we'll love each other and come to some sort of understanding.

We have done this dance before, and no doubt we'll do it again. But hopefully our next dance we'll have more patience and understanding. As we've been doing this for a long time.

With all my love,

Your Mother.

True Terror

My blog has, yes been lacking entries. But I have a good excuse. On August 28, 2007 our beautiful son Jack graced our lives with his entry into the world. And it was not an easy entry.

I've been scared. I've been the pure adrenaline scared when I went cliff jumping a few years ago. I've been to haunted houses and the crazy goat man terrorized me with his evil menace. My husband and I were living here in DC during 9/11 and that was a scary time. But on August 28 I learned what it was to be truly terrified.

Our second little one decided that he wanted to be very, very late. And being pregnant in August is no picnic. Because our little one was 2 weeks late that meant I needed to be induced. We went into the hospital on Sunday night very excited that sometime on Monday we would be holding our little bundle of blue joy in our arms.

We checked into the hospital and they started me in my induction process. My husband and I settled in. We got a decent night sleep which was unusual being we were at the hospital Monday morning came and I was still only dilated 1 cm. They started me on ptosin at about 11 AM. At 3 pm the contractions were becoming really intense and at last the relief of sweet epidural. Though my contractions were on the magnitude of a huge earthquake I was only 4 cm. The doctor stared talking C-section which I was adamantly against. So we waited...

At 6 pm I was 5 cm. Talk of the c-word started again.. At 8 pm I was 8 cm. Finally at 9:30 pm I was 10 and could start pushing. I was so excited to finally meet my little guy....

But alas, he was not going to meet us so easily. I pushed for 2 and a half hours to no avail. Jack did not want to come out. At this point his heartbeat was racing and it was becoming clear he had to come out as soon as possible. Respecting my birth plan my doctor told me we would do forceps, vacuum and if he still was not coming we would have to do a c-section. I had been in labor so long at this point my epidural had worn off. It wasn't pleasant.

The forceps failed, but finally after the second vacuum attempt, Jack was out. But he wasn't crying- and the fear took over my body. I saw them take him to infant area of the delivery room as the NICU team raced in. But that sound a new parent waits to hear was not echoing the room. I was screaming "Why isn't he crying?" My OB told me the cord had been wrapped around his neck and he had breathed in some amniotic fluid. And than at last I heard his beautiful cry. I was able to hold him for a few brief seconds before the doctors took him to NICU to observe him. Jack had to stay in there for a week. Once his breathing stabilized and they could take him off the respirator. But he had to stay for observation for infection as his white blood cell count was high. He also developed Jaundice and had to be under the burger lamp. But that was the least of our worries.

I hardly ever left his side that week.

That was 6 weeks ago. He's home now and is a very healthy boy. The other night I put my face close to his as I often do, and as we shared the same air, I thanked the universe for my beautiful boy and for the air we both share.

Raising Amy Whinehouse

As my little princess awoke this morning, I noticed her little beehive hair do that had made in her sleep and as I was not greeted with good morning, but "Nooooooo, Nooooooooo, Noooooooo" instead, I wondered when Amy Winehouse moved in and my 2 year old moved out....

A simple No! used to do when asked something, but as Ally develops more soul, she makes it more clear of what it is she doesn't want.

"Put your monkey shirt on"

"Nooooo, Noooooo, Nooooooooo"

"Please eat your eggs"

"Noooooo, Nooooo, Nooooo"

"Bathtime!"

"I don't want a bath, Nooo, Noooo, Noooo"

I just hope at this rate, we stick to virgin apple juice martini's and that rehab is a "Noooo, Nooooooo, Nooooooooo"

Compromises

As parents of a 2.5 year old we are being trained as mediators. Every day is a new battle and a new compromise. I'm starting to run out of ideas!

The latest compromise is in the evenings when she changes after school and can't find the underwear she wants to wear, she wants to wear a swimsuit. The swimsuit than leads to the next compromise which is bath time. We love to swim in the pool but hate the bathtub. So she wears her swimsuit into the bath pool. Which makes bath time interesting as we stuff soap down her swimsuit.


I can only imagine the compromises to be in our future.

Daddy's Gone to Mexico

For the past 2 weeks we have been running VERY late in the morning. This results in giving Jason a ride to the metro on our way to school.

But apparently Daddy doesn't go to work. As Ally puts it as we're leaving " We take Daddy to Mexico!" I would like to go to Mexico too.

Stolen Moments

It was 3 AM when Ally came into our bed last night. She doesn't wake up often in the middle of the night, but when she does it's just easier to lay her in between us. Her little body just feel so good curled up to ours, though it usually involves a foot in the eye, a finger in the ear or a mid night serenade of vegetables or where is thumbkin.

As she laid beside me last night I leaned over and kissed her cheek waiting for the usual "NO! MOMMY DON"T KISS ME!' but instead was surprised. She turned her head and gave me a smile and kissed me 3 times on the lips and said " I love you mommy" and than settled into the crook of my arm and went to sleep.

That moment made 3 AM totally worth getting up for.